Reconnecting.

I'm on vacation!! Yay! In the physical, mental and familial aftermath of billing 250 hours last month, I decided to take this week off.  For real.  I have only checked my email twice since Sunday.   My hubby and I took the boys on a short "one tank" trip for a couple of days to get away and strengthen the family ties that have become worn because I am out of place.  Yes, out of place.  When your husband has to call you to come home from work at midnight because you're still there engrossed in a project- that is out of place.  When your seven year old is the ONLY child in his class whose mommy didn't show up for the Mother's Day program because she had to work out of town- that is out of place.  When your four year old can't sleep at night (because you're not home) and is taking three hour naps in preschool to make up for it- that is out of place.  When you have no desire to be a wife to your husband because you've just worked a string of 14+ hour days- that is definitely out of place.  I knew that a change had to come, but spending time with my family this week confirmed it.  I haven't been this happy and relaxed in months.  My boys haven't been this happy and relaxed in months.  My husband and I haven't gone this long without snapping at each other in months.  Good times.  Yesterday we went to the zoo, the mall, out to eat, and swimming in the hotel pool.  At the end of the day I took a video of the boys to recap our adventures. When I asked them their favorite part of the day, the four year old answered immediately:  "Being with you!"  My thoughts exactly.   I am praying for a new opportunity to open up soon.

Excellence is Deliberate!

When Late Nights Collide With Early Mornings

Last night I pulled an all-nighter.  The kind that starts at 12pm on a Sunday afternoon and ends on Monday morning  after the kids get ready for school.  ALL NIGHT LONG.    On the bright side, I watched at least 3 episodes of Law and Order, an episode of cheers and the Meryl Streep/Alec Baldwin romantic comedy, "It's Complicated" before the sun came up.  Side note: That movie is HILARIOUS at 3 in the morning!   So why was I up all night?  Working on a 35 page brief that absolutely, positively had to get done.  The good news:  I've billed at least 60 hours in the past week related to this project. In case you're not a firm lawyer, here's everything you need to know about billable hours: more = better. The bad news- I've billed at least 60 hours on this in the past week - on top of hours billed for other clients and non-billable work.  That is EXHAUSTING.  Nothing hurts me more than coming home from work after my boys fall asleep.  In fact, on Thursday, my husband sent me a text around midnight telling me to come home because (1) It was friggin MIDNIGHT and (2) my poor four year old was crying that he couldn't sleep until I got home.  Now that sucks.

When I started this job, my oldest son was in kindergarten.  I blinked and he is now getting ready to begin second grade.  Time flies when you are (almost completely) distracted.  My husband and I have been talking and we agree--We can't go out like that.  Preparing for the next transition.  More talk on that later.

For now, I need to get some sleep.

Excellence is deliberate.

Get in the Game.

Timing is everything.  Last week, I had my first encounter with a life coach.  I was nervous.  Talking to a life coach is like going to counseling, without the option of blaming your parents or your husband for your personal hangups.  It was paid for by a leadership program that I'm participating in, so we only had 30 minutes.  In this scenario, the past and the present become irrelevant.  It's all about the future.

She encouraged me to write down where I want to be professionally and personally in 20 years and work my way back to 2012.  That kind of freedom to shape the future is completely liberating.  I've always known that I want to do more than practice law.  This exercise helped me to articulate my goals and begin to think through my current situation through the eyes of my future self.  Thanks life coach- for the first time in months, I am back in the game.